fool for love

There's a girl.

what's more is that I'm attracted to this girl... and it's been a long, long time since I've felt that way for much longer than a passing glance on the street... (well, not counting that one most recent girl I was attracted to for about two years, not counting her) I'm probably going to ask this girl out and I'm scared as hell but the funny thing is I'm not scared she'll say no, I'm scared that she'll say yes. See, there's a reason I haven't been attracted to anyone in a long time and that's because getting involved with someone could be very dangerous for me right now... it's been dangerous up till now anyways... pretty damn dangerous.

It could be really good too.

I almost asked her out today... but no words came. I just smiled for her. if that box of baggies in my fist had been a bouquet I'd have handed them to her... but they weren't roses, they were baggies, so I went on past, just trailing her with my eyes a little, and walked out of the Sumesa grocery store. I caught her and the other girl leaning over their damned counter to catch a better glimpse of me as I left their store. I know she'll say yes. Damn it all to hell.

...and there were chopsticks in her hair...

Roselyn. Her name is Roselyn.


She looks young though... like 19 young, not like 16 young.... so she's probably like 15. Oh God, that would be bad... If she is I think her parents have the right to make me marry her and move into their house or something, lol. She works there most of the day, but the schools are out right now for the teens... maybe this is just her summer job. No way to tell. Jeez, I'd seriously feel like a dirty old 26 year-old sleaze-ball. But she looks 19 to me.... ...lucky 19...

I'm a fool for love, I freely admit it, but what should I do? Resist the urge? Join the priesthood? Detatch my penis?

I don't think so.



...besides, if I were a priest, 15 wouldn't be all that young.