swimming toward lucidity

so it goes... sink or swim. I'm not sure if any of this is real but I have to deal with the fact :I'm alone in the middle of an ocean: I don't want to drown in it. I learn to swim and practice. there is no island to swim for, nor surrender, nor substance, nor permanence; only practice until I reach the below, way, way, down. The question is do I sink now or do I sink later. there's a rock ahead. I'll rest there and think about it. two strokes forward, one wave back. I call it coasting.